The No Bullshit Guide to Overcoming Procrastination As An Overachiever.

And 10 ways to beat it!

For the podcast version see SoundCloud.

It’s no harm to think big and reach for the stars. But what happens when it sends us into a downward spiral of self-doubt? What about when we fall into the procrastination doom loop? Or when we feel like what we are doing is never enough or good enough?

We get stuck.

You can only take giant steps on the moon. The reality is us mere mortals operate better when we take small steps and learn to prioritize. I am a self confessed, recovering overachiever. It is something I have to work on daily to overcome its pitfalls and avoid my procrastination doom loops.

So what are the classic symptoms of overachievers and overachieving?

1. One feels like they are never doing enough.

2. One fails to give themselves credit for what they have managed to achieve.

3. One focuses on all they have to do and learn instead of what they know already.

4. One wants to know it all now but frets over not having enough time.

5. One gets nothing done.

6. One adopts the attitude that if one can’t do it all at once, it is a waste of time.

How ironic is the latter considering the former fretting over not having enough time?

It’s like trying to run a marathon when you can’t even run 5 km. So you give up because there is no point. My belief is an overachievers habits get fuel from society. The societal stereotypes that encourage instant gratification. I see the demands people place on themselves and that clients and employers place on them. 4 pm on a Friday was when everyone wanted everything straight away in my former role.

Context and rational thinking go out the door.

We want it all, and we want it now. We get impatient. With impatience comes frustration with frustration comes procrastination. Loop after loop ensues. Has someone ever told you-you are not doing enough? Or that what you have done is not good enough? Perhaps they said you have to kill yourself 24/7 to succeed. It is everywhere from LinkedIn to Instagram and Facebook.

Images and quotes in your face all the time. Talk about bullshit. If your anything like me this stuff will get grate on you while you are trying to grind!

I am not saying there is any substitute for hard work. But aligning it with priorities and putting it in context is critical. You don’t have to be up at 4 am to be productive or do more significant work than anybody else to succeed. You could do 4 hours of shit work at 5 am, and 30 minutes of meaningful, productive work at 7 p.m.

It is an individual choice and a matter of alignment with the vision and priority from a place of where you are at now. To define your measure of success you have to connect with your head and your heart. You have to allow yourself to be human. Learning to control our responses to this hysteria helps us avoid procrastination. It enables us to know we are enough and are doing enough to make our vision a reality in time.

To understand overachieving and its pitfalls we must first understand what drives overachievers?

David McClelland, a Harvard psychologist, studies motivation. In particular how it affects leaders or ones desire to lead others. He identified three internal drivers common in overachievers: achievement, affiliation and power.

He defines them as follows:

Achievement: The desire to surpass a set of standards, and its drive to succeed.

Affiliation: The maintaining of close personal relationships.

Power: The need for power and acceptance that comes with being strong and influencing. A desire to make an impact on others.

McClelland’s research showed that all three motives are present to some extent in everyone. Do you agree? He believes that of the three motives, achievement was the most critical to success. In later works, he argues that “socialised” power is the primary motivator of the most effective leaders.

What is “socialised” power? It is the drive to help others to be successful.

But you can’t drive others to be successful if you are not successful yourself. Boom! This is in my opinion where the pressure to succeed and overachieve begins again. You are back in a procrastination doom loop.

Am I good enough?

Am I successful enough?

Am I doing enough?

So how can you escape the doom loop and go from overachiever to achiever?

1. Reconnect with your values and define your measure of success to move forward!
2. Go back to your “why.”
3. Remove your blind spots and obstacles that are getting in your way.
4. Start where you are right now not where you want to be in 5 years time. Thinking too far ahead only causes more frustration.
5. Control what you can, let go of what you can’t. It is empowering.
6. Embrace the strength and success that small wins bring. Bank them and use them to move you forward on the days you feel like you are not doing enough.
7. Ditch the bullshit and be realistic. Being unrealistic around your vision is a great way to become demotivated and to succumb to the negative moods that fuel procrastination.
8. Shut off the internal chatterbox. Tell yourself I am not going to over-complicate this or make it any harder than it needs to be.
9. Stop being a perfectionist. It is a sure fire way to get nothing done.
10. Forgive yourself. You might believe that punishing yourself will help you to avoid procrastination in the future, but it makes it worse. Beating yourself up sends you right back into the procrastination doom loop.

Coaching overachievers can be challenging but it is not impossible. I have had the most competent and skilled coaches even become frustrated with me in the process. They called it out on a professional level and did a great job regardless.

My personal experience as a coach requires me to meet an overachiever where they are at. They may not be used to being challenged. When I intervene on a professional level, and with their permission, it changes their perspective. I encourage them to slow down and help them see their reality. Their reality without the bullshit shoved in their faces by social media and from society.

They then can create the space to have “aha” moments and get it. Now that is how you define a partnership for progress as a success. For more on career coaching and pivot consulting see my website or drop me a message to request a callback.

Register for the next pivot cafe in Bestseller cafe in Dublin city centre on the 27th September from 6 pm — 8 pm. There are only two slots available per month so they will be allocated on a first come first served basis. Email me at pauline@paulineharley.com to secure your space today.

Happy to connect and help as always!

Originally published at https://www.linkedin.com on August 27, 2018.